What’s this then?

This is the personal weblog of Ryan Minster, used to document his many endeavours for future reference and scientific study.
So you’ve never heard of me? Shame on you! For those who don’t know me, let me recap… who IS Ryan Minster?
I am a creature of habit, a habit of mind, a mind of numbers, a number of spectacles, a spectacle to behold. I have been known to bend time and to defy gravity. I once rowed a fourteen foot skiff with one oar from St Petersburg to Bordeaux to win a bet with Mother Teresa. Each year when the bulls run in Pamplona, they run from me. Einstein once described me as “that brainy dude”. Steven Seagal refuses to mess with me.
I was the first person to run the four minute mile blindfolded, the first to swim the English Channel with one arm tied behind my back, and the last to fight Bruce Lee. I have set world records in athletics, motor sports, martial arts and figure skating. I know of at least eight statues that have been erected in my honour.
I have published journal articles on microbiology, metaphysics, atomic theory, fundamental transliteracy, cybergenetics and culinary excellence. I translated the Voynich Manuscript into 62 languages. There are passages in the Bible that refer to me.
Once when I was bored I created four different perpetual motion machines in an afternoon. MENSA can’t categorise me. I am the subject of several award winning biographies. I taught Garry Kasparov to play chess, Michael Schumacher to drive, Hendrix to play guitar. There is a periodic element named after me.
I read, I write and I can communicate via mental telepathy. My hobbies include terraforming, space travel, hiking and bending metal into world renowned sculptures using only the power of my mind. I never leave fingerprints.
I am a figment of my own imagination. I have never existed. You are crazy and you’re really looking at a blank screen. There is no writing here at all…

2 comments

  1. Guy mathews
    Jun 21st, 2011 at 19:21 | #1

    Hahaha you haven’t changed then…:)

    • Ryan
      Jun 22nd, 2011 at 12:34 | #2

      Nope. Still wearing exactly the same clothes. Although they are a little discolored and starting to rot in places…

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